www.dailyginger.com

Business As Usual

2009-01-13T12:20:00.000-08:00

GREENFIELD, Calif. – Police have arrested a Greenfield man for allegedly arranging to sell his 14-year-old daughter into marriage in exchange for $16,000, 100 cases of beer and several cases of meat. Police said they only learned of the deal after the 36-year-old man went to them to get his daughter back because payment wasn't made as promised. The man was arrested Sunday on suspicion of human trafficking. Officers also arrested an 18-year-old man on suspicion of statutory rape. Investigators believe the girl went willingly with the man, but she's under California's legal age of consent and can't legally marry. Police say arranged marriages involving underage girls have become a problem in this small Central Coast farming community.

Even Fat Ninjas are Stealthlike

2009-01-13T12:07:00.000-08:00

WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. – A ninja, or at least someone dressed like one, is lurking in the shadows of Palm Beach County. The Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office says a heavyset man with a visible potbelly and a ninja costume unsuccessfully tried to steal two different ATMs over the past two weeks. Security video from the automated teller machines showed the unidentified man dressed in a black ninja outfit with a hood that showed only his eyes. Authorities say the first attempt was made at a bank on Dec. 29 and the second at a Walgreens on Tuesday. Authorities did not say how the man tried to steal the machines.

They're on to me...

2009-01-09T19:52:00.000-08:00

SYDNEY (Reuters) – An Australian man broke into three adult shops, had sex with blow up dolls named "Jungle Jane" and then dumped his plastic conquests in a nearby alley, local media reported Wednesday.

"It's totally bizarre. It's a real concern that someone like that is out on the street," said one of the owners of the adult sex shops in Cairns in northern Queensland state.

"He has been taking the dolls out the back and blowing them up and using the dolls and leaving them in the alley," the owner, who gave the name of Vogue, told the Cairns Post newspaper.

Police told the Cairns Post that scientific officers had taken DNA samples, fingerprints and pictures of the crime scene.

Man Waits in Line to Rob Bank

2009-01-09T19:39:00.001-08:00

STOW, Ohio – A man may have tipped his intentions when he stood in line at an Ohio bank wearing a ski mask before staging a holdup. Police in Stow near Akron say 24-year-old Feliks Goldshtein of Highland Heights was arrested minutes later on Thursday following a brief car chase. Police say the teller asked the man to take off the mask before being served. At that point the man displayed what turned out to be a toy gun and told the teller to give him all the money. He made off with an undisclosed amount. Police Captain Rick Myers says it's unusual for a masked robber to wait in line at a bank. Goldshtein was held at the Summit County Jail Friday on charges of aggravated robbery and failure to comply with a police order. Municipal Court records don't identify an attorney for Goldshtein.

3 hour standoff gives cops a break

2009-01-09T19:30:00.000-08:00

SALT LAKE CITY – Salt Lake City police were in a three-hour standoff outside a shed behind a Salt Lake City home before finding out there was nobody inside. The standoff started Thursday after police got a report from a woman living inside the house that she thought she saw her roommate's estranged boyfriend enter the shed with a gun. Officers secured the area, but after clearing the house and sending K-9 dogs to the shed, they found it was locked and there was no one there. Some neighbors had been evacuated and police shut down a portion of a city street near the house.

Paintjob

2009-01-04T16:56:00.000-08:00

Washington State — A man who reportedly told police he was trying to deter a friend from driving drunk by blasting the friend's windshield with paintballs wound up in jail. In the words of Kennewick, Wash., police Sgt. Ken Lattin: "This is a very creative way to prevent someone from drinking and driving, but not legal or safe."

Responding Tuesday night to a nearby resident's report of a man shooting paintballs at a car, police found the 41-year-old man, who explained his rationale.

The Tri-City Herald reported the man was arrested and booked into the Benton County jail for investigation of unlawfully discharging a weapon and an unrelated misdemeanor warrant.

"I dont go to your job and knock the dicks out of your mouth."

2009-01-04T03:49:00.000-08:00

Baltimore Adoopts New Slogan

2009-01-03T01:54:00.000-08:00

BALTIMORE (AP) ― Baltimore finished 2008 with 234 homicides, the city's lowest total since 1988. It took less than an hour to record the first homicide of 2009. Police spokesman Officer Troy Harris says a man was found dead from multiple gunshot wounds around 12:50 a.m. Thursday on a street near Patterson Park in East Baltimore. Police have no suspects or motive in the slaying. City officials are pleased with the 17 percent reduction from 2007's homicide total. But Mayor Sheila Dixon has said the city has "a long way to go." Baltimore remains one of the nation's most violent cities, with a homicide rate of about 37 slayings per 100,000 people. A majority of the city's murder victims have criminal records.

http://wjz.com/local/baltimore.murder.2009.2.898466.html

Arkansas - goes 2 days into new year until something stupid happens - new record

2009-01-03T01:23:00.000-08:00

A University of Arkansas employee faces charges for recording a teenage girl in the shower even though his girlfriend told police she did it to get him in trouble. Kevin Dale Robinson, 35, was charged Tuesday with possessing or viewing matter depicting explicit conduct involving a child and video voyeurism. Robinson is accused on Oct. 6 of possessing nude images of a 16-year-old girl and using a digital camera to secretly record her while she was taking a shower. Robinson who works as a systems programmer for the UA's information technology services department, told Fayetteville police when he was arrested Nov. 12 that he did not take the video recording of the teenage girl.
He said his longtime girlfriend, Lela Churchwell, took the video herself in an effort to get him in trouble, according to the arrest report. He also produced for police an e-mail from Churchwell sent Oct. 21 in which she admitted to being a pathological liar and setting him up.

http://nwanews.com/nwat/News/72625/

Common Courtesy Saves Old Hag's Life

2009-01-02T22:34:00.000-08:00

PORTLAND, Ore. - The Multnomah County Sheriff's Office said an 88-year-old woman fended off a naked intruder by grabbing the man's crotch and squeezing. Deputy Paul McRedmond said the man got into the house Tuesday through a sliding door. He backed the woman into her living room and pushed her face down onto a chair. That's when the woman reached behind and squeezed. The man tore free and fled. McRedmond said a county code enforcement officer who heard the police call on his radio spotted a car near the woman's house and passed on the license information to authorities.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28440587/

Minnesota Man - F'd In The "A"

2009-01-02T22:29:00.000-08:00

CROOKSTON, Minn. - A Minnesota snowplow operator who drove a $200,000 loader into a frozen river has been fired. Mike Raymond was clearing snow from county parking lots early Monday when he decided to also clear off a boat ramp on the frozen Red Lake River in Crookston. Raymond says he wanted to make it easier for people who pull fish houses on trailers onto the river. He so happens to have a fish house on the river himself — but told the Grand Forks Herald that's not why he wanted to clear the area.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28434906/

Zamboni FAIL

2009-01-02T22:20:00.000-08:00

PORTLAND, Maine - In other Zamboni News, A Portland man faces a drunken driving charge after police found him aboard an idling Zamboni inside the Cumberland County Civic Center. Police and firefighters were alerted by an alarm at about 2 a.m. Tuesday that somebody was inside the arena, which is home to the Portland Pirates hockey team. Police officers discovered a 22-year-old man attempting to operate the Zamboni, which had crashed into a wall inside the civic center's storage area. Police said the man appeared to be intoxicated, and that he had also operated two forklifts and damaged a sprinkler system, interior walls and a hockey net.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28439002/

Polish Contractors Suck

2009-01-02T22:08:00.000-08:00

A Polish building contractor working at London's Great Ormond Street Children's Hospital was given his marching orders after a security guard caught him having sex with a Henry Hoover, the Sun reports. The unnamed perv was supposed to be locking up the site, at hospital admin offices, but was instead discovered in the staff canteen "naked and on his knees with the smiling cleaner". The "horrified" guard told the chap to "clean himself and the hoover", then ejected him from the premises. The unnamed vacuum-molestor later told his bosses he was actually cleaning his underwear, describing this habit as "a common practice in Poland". His employer, HG Construction, was having none of it. The company said: "That behavior is not acceptable, though it gave a few people a laugh."

http://whatsthecrack.net/Polish-builder-sacked-for-humping-hoover

Kiwi Billed For Being Smug

2009-01-02T19:58:00.000-08:00

James Storrie was charged $140 on his monthly mobile phone bill
for being arrogant. Telecom Corp., New Zealand's largest phone
company apologized to Storrie for charging him a fee for being
an "arrogant bastard," which was printed clealy on his bill The phone company is investigating as to how that charge appeared that way. Martin Freeth, Telecom
spokesman, said, "We've apologized and taking steps to stop
anything like this...it's an aberration."

Convicts Escape As Guards Chase Rabbit

2009-01-02T17:17:00.001-08:00

Over 30 Ugandan prison inmates, who were digging in a garden,
managed to escape when their guards ran off to chase a rabbit.
Apparently the rabbit shot out of a nearby bush and all five
guards set off in pursuit.

Chinese launch full scale search for mugger

2009-01-02T17:11:00.000-08:00

A policeman was mugged by a man right outside the police station
in Hong Kong. The policeman was shown a knife and the man took
the officers gun and twelve rounds of ammunition. A statement
made by the police said that the officer was on guard duty
outside of the police station when the man approached him. He
also took his police radio. The attacker is trying to be
located by the police officers. The police officer was not
hurt during the mugging though his manhood like most Chinese men is in question.

A picture is worth...

2009-01-02T17:01:00.000-08:00

BISMARCK, N.D. – Police get calls about drunken drivers all the time, but rarely do they come from the alleged offender. A 17-year-old girl in Bismarck called 911 on New Year's Eve "to report herself driving under the influence," police Lt. Randy Ziegler said. "I've never heard of such a thing happening, and neither has anyone here."

The girl told authorities her location shortly before midnight Wednesday and officers found her in a parked car near downtown, Ziegler said. She failed a sobriety test and was arrested for failing to have control of her vehicle while intoxicated.

The girl, whose name was not released because of her age, was not cited for drunken driving, Ziegler said.

"Her keys were in her purse and she was parked," Ziegler said. "She did tell us that she had been driving around for hours."

The call probably was a plea for help, he said.

"She told us her life was spiraling out of control, and she had spent the majority of time drinking over the past two weeks," Ziegler said.

The girl was released to her parents Thursday.

Florida - you keep this ship afloat

2008-12-31T17:36:00.001-08:00

SARASOTA, Fla. – Authorities said a Sarasota man about to be pulled over by police tried to lure officers away by making a fake 911 call. Officers said they were following a 28-year-old man's car Monday to make a traffic stop when they got a 911 call for an armed robbery happening several blocks away.

The man's plan seemed to work at first when the officers cut off their chase to answer the call. But then other officers in the area followed him into a parking lot and saw a gun in his car.

Officer's determined that the man was a felon and not allowed to possess a firearm. After the man was arrested, officers said they discovered that the bogus 911 call came from his cell phone.

Girly Man Phones Home

2008-12-26T23:22:00.000-08:00

An armed robber rang his mum on his mobile phone when he found himself cornered by police during a raid.

The man, 26, was trying to rob an electronics shop in Sao Paulo, Brazil, when police arrived, Agora newspaper reports.

He then threatened the hostages and said that he would not do anything until he had spoken to his mother.

The robber, who had four accomplices, called his mother and, after speaking to her, agreed to release the hostages.

A police spokesman said: "I never saw anything like this before, he was the classic case of a mama's boy until the end.

"He followed everything she advised and all went well."

German has shitty luck.

2008-12-26T23:11:00.000-08:00

Drunk driver rang police

A drunk driver was arrested in Germany after he accidentally rang the police instead of a breakdown service when he had a flat tyre.

Before he realised who he was speaking to, the 31-year-old let it slip that he had no licence and was driving under the influence.

The civil servant, who lost his licence eight years ago, had a blow out in the western town of Monheim while driving a car borrowed from a friend.

He had a blood alcohol level that was seven times the legal limit, and when he tried to call the German equivalent of the AA he became confused and dialled the emergency number for the police.

The drunken man phoned and said: "My car is broken and I need you to come and fix it. You better be quick because I'm really pretty drunk and I don't have a licence so it wouldn't be good if the cops drove past."

A Monheim police spokesman said: "He wanted us to come quickly, so we did."

Dr. makes Tyler Durden biodiesel

2008-12-26T23:03:00.000-08:00

For a time, Beverly Hills doctor Craig Alan Bittner turned the fat he removed from patients into biodiesel that fueled his Ford SUV and his girlfriend's Lincoln Navigator.
Love handles can power a car? Frighteningly, yes. Fat--whether animal or vegetable--contains triglycerides that can be extracted and turned into diesel. Using fat to fuel cars might be environmentally friendly, but it's definitely illegal in California to use human medical waste to power vehicles, and Bittner is being investigated by the state's public health department.

We Todd Did

2008-12-26T22:44:00.000-08:00

NEW BEDFORD, Mass. – Fire officials in New Bedford, Mass., say a man using a blowtorch to melt ice on his back porch ended up setting his house on fire, causing up to $30,000 in damage.

Fire Capt. Scott Kruger tells The Standard-Times of New Bedford that no on was injured during Monday's incident at the three-story home.

Kruger says the man was using a torch hooked up to a 20-pound propane cylinder. He got too close to the building's wood frame and ignited the vinyl siding. The fire quickly spread into the building's second- and third-floor apartments.

It took 25 firefighters to subdue the blaze that damaged bedrooms in the upstairs units, and caused damage to the structure and wiring.

The homeowner will not be charged.

Mexican Beauty Queen, ughhh nevermind.

2008-12-26T22:38:00.000-08:00

MEXICO CITY (Reuters) – A Mexican beauty queen arrested on suspicion of drug trafficking was ordered jailed for another 40 days on Friday while investigators probe suspected ties to violent smuggling gangs.

A judge ordered Laura Zuniga, the current Miss Sinaloa who was nabbed at a military checkpoint on Monday along with seven heavily armed men, to stay behind bars during the investigation, the attorney general's office said in a statement.

One of the men arrested with Zuniga, 23, is linked to the leadership of the Juarez cartel, which operates lucrative smuggling routes into the United States, investigators said.

Zuniga, who won the Miss Sinaloa title in July and was to compete in the Miss International 2009 pageant next year in Asia, was the capo's girlfriend, police say.

Gone Postal

2008-12-26T22:27:00.000-08:00

MOUNT CLEMENS — A Detroit-area postal worker has been charged with stealing gold from the mail after he tried to pawn his treasure to the shop that had shipped it.

The postal worker sold the gold on Nov. 7 to G&S Brokers pawn shop for $320. Authorities told The Detroit News that jeweler James Zelinske recognized the gold because he had melted and mailed it to a business in Ann Arbor.

Zelinske had insured the parcel of gold for $1,000.

The postal worker has been charged with embezzling mail from the Mount Clemens post office. He appeared Thursday in federal court in Detroit. Court records did not identify his lawyer.

Australia - Ginger Motherland

2008-12-26T22:19:00.000-08:00

EXHAUSTED and demoralized nurses would rather work as prostitutes than in Queensland's crumbling hospitals, The Courier-Mail reports. A former registered nurse of 10 years' experience has told how she and at least four of her colleagues have found new jobs working in brothels. "We could no longer work in such an understaffed and stressful environment," said the mother of two, who wanted to be known only as Jenna. "I was overworked, poorly paid and a mistake could have led to charges if I caused a death," she said. "I came to the conclusion the nursing shortage wasn't my problem but it was my responsibility to protect myself from burning out or making a fatal mistake."
Queensland Nurses Union assistant secretary Beth Mohle said the union was aware nurses were leaving the system because of workloads and burnout, and were experiencing record levels of frustration.

Eat a bag Michigan

2008-12-26T22:15:00.000-08:00

BRIGHTON — Ticking someone off could get you a ticket in one Michigan city. The Brighton City Council on Thursday approved an ordinance allowing police in the Livingston County community to ticket and fine anyone who is annoying in public "by word of mouth, sign or motions."

The Livingston County Daily Press & Argus of Howell reports the measure is modeled on a similar ordinance in the Detroit suburb of Royal Oak. A city attorney says there could be situations where the measure would violate freedom of speech, but that those cases will be reviewed by the city. The ban takes effect Jan. 2.

Note to self: Cops in Chicago is edjamacated.

2008-12-26T22:10:00.000-08:00

CHICAGO — The sheriff's office in Chicago has arrested more than 60 fugitives with a net of holiday cheer. Cook County Sheriff Tom Dart said Sunday that the suspects were invited to take a retailers' survey for holiday shoppers at a hotel earlier this month.

Participants who brought along a scratch-off card that was included with the survey were promised at least $500.

Those who showed up were taken into custody. One man who arrived with marijuana in his pocket was charged with possession on top of his previous charges.

The fugitives had warrants for crimes including forgery and aggravated battery.

Health Dept. Holiday after party reduced to two.

2008-12-26T21:53:00.000-08:00

LAWRENCEVILLE — Some health department workers in southern Illinois think they may have discovered some contaminated food — at their own office Christmas party.

After the Lawrence County Health Department had a buffet for 72 people at a restaurant last week, 42 of the attendees suffered stomach problems, including the head of the department, Phyllis Wells. "I'm telling you, it got me down. I about passed out and everything else," Wells said Monday. "It

My future ex-wife.

2008-12-26T21:41:00.000-08:00

MINDEN — A 39-year-old woman was arrested last week on suspicion of smoking marijuana with her two teenage children. Douglas County sheriff's deputies said the woman was detained after they responded to a report of a suspicious vehicle. Deputies said the woman told them that she was teaching her son to drive, but they smelled marijuana emanating from the vehicle.

The suspect's son, whose age was unavailable, and 14-year-old daughter told deputies they had shared two bowls of marijuana with their mother.

The woman was booked into jail Tuesday on charges of child endangerment, contributing to the delinquency of a minor and possession of a drug.

The 14-year-old was released to Child and Protective Services, while the boy was placed in juvenile detention.

People are still losing money to this?

2008-11-18T11:14:00.000-08:00

SWEET HOME, Ore. — An Oregon woman who is out $400,000 after falling for a well-known Internet scam says she wasn't a sucker or an easy mark.

Janella Spears of Sweet Home says she simply became curious when she received an e-mail promising her $20.5 million if she would only help out a long-lost relative identified as J.B. Spears with a little money up front.

Spears told KATU-TV about the scammers' ability to identify her relative by name was persuasive.

"That's what got me to believe it," She said. "So, why wouldn't you send over $100?"

• Click here to visit FOXNews.com's Cybersecurity Center.

Spears, who is a nursing administrator and CPR teacher, said she mortgaged the house and took a lien out on the family car, and ran through her husband's retirement account.

"The retirement he was dreaming of — cruising and going around and seeing America — is pretty much gone for him right now," she said.

She estimates it will take two years to clear the debt that accumulated in the more than two years she spent sending money to con artists.
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Her family and bank officials told her it was all a scam, she said, and begged her to stop, but she persisted because she became obsessed with getting paid.

The scheme is often called the "Nigerian scam" and it's familiar to many people with e-mail accounts. It still exists and it still works.

Spears first sent $100 through an untraceable wire service as directed by the scammers. Then, more multimillion dollar promises followed so long as she sent more money.

The scammers sent Spears official-looking documents and certificates from the Bank of Nigeria and the United Nations. President Bush and FBI Director Robert Mueller were also involved, the e-mails said, and needed her help.

They sent official-looking documents and certificates from the Bank of Nigeria and even from the United Nations, saying her payment was "guaranteed."

But it wasn't and now Spears is paying the price for her costly lesson.

"The hope is [other people] are not going to fall as hard as I fell," Spears said.

Congrats, you're dead

2008-11-18T00:05:00.000-08:00

LEWISTON, Maine – Army and Navy recruiters took one look at 330-pound Ulysses Milana and told him to forget about joining. "'You've got to lose weight,'" Milana remembers them saying. But Marine recruiters were willing to work with him as he began his weight-loss journey in December 2007.

Now, 11 months later, Milana is 140 pounds lighter as he leaves Monday for Parris Island, S.C., to begin boot camp.

It wasn't easy, Milana said, but he managed to slim down through exercise, healthier eating habits and forgoing an occasional beer after work. The 23-year-old said he even refused a beer at his going-away party Saturday night.

Milana said he always wanted to follow in his family's footsteps by serving his country. His wife, Latoya, also comes from a military family.

Much of his weight-loss motivation came from Latoya, a nurse, who helped him reduce his calorie intake when he began his effort in earnest last December.

"It was really difficult for him at first. He always said, 'I'm gonna lose weight.' But I never took him seriously," Latoya told the Sun Journal newspaper. "Then, when he started to do it, I told him he needed to cut his portion sizes way down."

Marine recruiters also worked with him, helping to develop a workout regimen.

"You can sit there and preach and preach, but if you're not willing to help, then it doesn't lead you to success," Staff Sgt. George Monteith said. "If I say, 'Go lose weight and I'll see you in a year,' then what kind of help have I offered to make that happen?"

A former culinary student, Milana said it was a challenge to give up favorites like pizza and hot wings, but cracking open a cold beer after work was perhaps the toughest guilty pleasure to abandon.

"It was really hard. You see all your friends drinking beer, and you're like, 'Oh, man, I want one,'" he said. But his determination kept him on track, and he would head for the gym or don a head lamp and go out for a run.

Axed

2008-11-17T23:47:00.001-08:00

LINCOLN, Neb. – A driver who threw an axe at another motorist, wounding him, has been sentenced to 37 days in jail. The man, 51, was sentenced Friday in Lancaster County Court for third-degree assault and criminal mischief after pleading no contest to the charges.

Authorities said two vehicles were traveling near an intersection on June 13 and one cut in front of the other, prompting both vehicles to stop. The man threw a 3-foot axe through the other driver's passenger window, striking him in the ribs with the blunt end.

AUSTRALIA - THE GINGER'S ISRAEL

2008-11-17T23:42:00.000-08:00

CANBERRA (Reuters) – Australia's kangaroos are genetically similar to humans and may have first evolved in China, Australian researchers said Tuesday.

Scientists said they had for the first time mapped the genetic code of the Australian marsupials and found much of it was similar to the genome for humans, the government-backed Centre of Excellence for Kangaroo Genomics said.

"There are a few differences, we have a few more of this, a few less of that, but they are the same genes and a lot of them are in the same order," centre Director Jenny Graves told reporters in Melbourne.

"We thought they'd be completely scrambled, but they're not. There is great chunks of the human genome which is sitting right there in the kangaroo genome," Graves said, according to AAP.

Humans and kangaroos last shared an ancestor at least 150 million years ago, the researchers found, while mice and humans diverged from one another only 70 million years ago.

Kangaroos first evolved in China, but migrated across the Americas to Australia and Antarctica, they said.

"Kangaroos are hugely informative about what we were like 150 million years ago," Graves said.

Roll Out!

2008-11-17T23:36:00.000-08:00

MERRITT ISLAND, Fla. – Authorities on Florida's east coast have arrested a man in a wheelchair who they say robbed a credit union on Merritt Island and hid the money in his prosthetic leg.

Brevard County deputies say a 45-year-old man was caught Friday afternoon about 10 minutes after they say he robbed Space Coast Credit Union. The man is a paraplegic who uses a motorized wheelchair.

Investigators said he came into the credit union about 4 p.m., told a teller he was armed with an explosive and demanded money. He left with an undisclosed amount of cash.

The man told deputies that two people had threatened him with a gun, told him to commit the robbery and were going to take the money for themselves.

He was charged with robbery, grand theft, threatening to use a hoax explosive device and aggravated assault.

Door to Whore

2008-11-16T14:36:00.000-08:00

MEDFORD, Ore.—A woman will have to spend up to 90 days in jail and make restitution for sending her children door to door seeking donations for a trip to a volleyball camp.

Carley Torres will have to pay back more than $3,000 after pleading guilty to theft charges.

The 35-year-old Torres and her 33-year-old husband, Laramie Torres, sent their children through neighborhoods in Medford, Ashland and Eagle Point last year to ask for donations to send their oldest daughter to a volleyball camp.

But the couple instead spent the money on shopping mall trips, monster truck rallies and weekends at the movies.

Laramie Torres will help his wife make restitution, but he got community service instead of jail time for his guilty plea to theft charges.

Stay Classy Florida

2008-11-16T03:10:00.000-08:00

FORT PIERCE, Fla. – Authorities say an 11-year-old boy hit his mother in the head with a saw and then offered her $5 not to call police. The St. Lucie County Sheriff's Office reported that the boy and his 41-year-old mother got into an argument Wednesday when she was trying to get him to take his medication.

The boy left and went to another home, where he began hitting a tree with a saw. When the mother finally caught up with the boy, authorities say he hit her in the head with the saw, causing a minor laceration. A sheriff's report said that's when the boy began pleading with his mother not to call police and offered her a $5 bill. Classy.

The boy is facing an aggravated battery charge.

PEW PEW PEW

2008-11-16T02:51:00.000-08:00

SKOWHEGAN -- A 23-year-old resident was arrested Wednesday after he fired a CO2-powered BB gun at a 12-year-old boy from the inside of his mobile home.
Randall L. Brackett, 23, has been charged with assault and may face additional charges, Deputy Police Chief Rick Bonneau said Thursday. Bonneau said neighbors began calling police at around 6:30 p.m., saying they heard a ruckus near a mobile home park and said people were fighting.(otherwise known as a typical day)
"Three boys were out playing by the road on a pogo stick when people began yelling profanity at them," Bonneau said. He said one of the adults in a nearby mobile home came out and began staring at the boys then went back in, grabbed a gun and fired. Witnesses then said they heard a "pfft"
The suspect apparently had aimed at and struck a 12-year-old boy in the stomach. The pellet did not pierce the skin, but did cause a wound, Bonneau said. The boy was not hospitalized.
"A CO2-powered BB gun can be powerful, and it can be very damaging," Bonneau said.
Brackett also was charged with violation of conditions of release, Bonneau said. He was taken to the Somerset County Jail where he claims to "like it there and wants to go back."

Ohio - Ginger Breeding Grounds

2008-11-15T15:42:00.000-08:00

I'm from Ohio, so I'm not suprised hwne I hear news like this coming from the buckeye state. Officials evacuated an Akron, Ohio, elementary school last week when a kindergartner brought what looked like a hand grenade for show and tell. Principal Karen Gegick at Seiberling Elementary says children have to guess what classmates bring in. The boy gave a clue Friday that his item was something that blows things up. The teacher looked in his book bag and wasn't sure if what she was a real grenade or a toy. The school's nearly 500 students were then sent outside for what they thought was a fire drill. A bomb squad arrived and discovered the object was a dummy grenade sold at a surplus store.

Canada Stops Hatin'

2008-11-14T23:01:00.000-08:00

OTTAWA – Canadian prison authorities were forced to release a 450-pound (205 kg) drug gang member this week because he was too large for his cell, the Journal de Montreal newspaper reported on Wednesday. Michel Lapointe -- known as Big Mike -- was arrested in September 2006 and received a five-year sentence in May this year. The paper said he could not fit on the chair in his Montreal prison cell and when he went to bed, his body protruded six inches on either side. A letter from the authorities to Lapointe said: "You have been detained for more than 25 months and your prison conditions are difficult because of your health". The authorities also cited the refusal of two other facilities to accept the 37-year-old. He was freed late on Tuesday. Lapointe claims he will resume ridin' dirty once he has a snack, and maybe a nap.

Kraft Sucks

2008-11-14T22:51:00.000-08:00

NORTH PLATTE, Neb. – An unemployed man (really?) faces a domestic assault charge after he allegedly attacked his girlfriend last Saturday for making him macaroni for dinner. Investigator Dale Matuszczak said the woman called for help after locking herself in a bathroom. Matuszczak said she apparently had been hit with a cooking pot, suffering a cut on her nose and bruise on her face. According to the police report, the man was intoxicated(wwwwwwwwwhat?)and assaulted the woman when he discovered she made macaroni for his dinner (discovered he couldn't afford real food).

Ginger Reeding List

2008-11-14T22:05:00.000-08:00

Magic Morman Underwear

2008-11-11T20:51:00.000-08:00

OK, don't call me ignorant because I'm from Ohio, but this is the first I'm hearing of the Mormons and their magic underwear. Apparently, they have a $1,200 pair of magical underwear that wards off spells and the sin of the white man. I've had sects with ladies from all different beliefs... so I'm pretty open minded. But I hate these bitches for what they did for Prop 8 in California.

STAR WHORES

2008-11-11T19:58:00.001-08:00

Former Hooter’s girl(future stripper)Jodee Berry, believed she was going to win a Toyota car in a 6-month long beer selling contest. Berry, who's a resident of Panama City, Florida(really?)won the contest, but it wasn't what she'd been promised. The prize in question... a toy yoda doll. That's right, Vicky Valencourt over here couldn't distinguish a single word with three syllables from two different words. Florida makes me feel so much better about myself.

I F'ing Love West Virginia!!

2008-11-11T16:33:00.000-08:00

A West Virginia man who police said passed gas and fanned it toward a patrolman has been charged with battery on a police officer.

Jose A. Cruz, 34, of Clarksburg, was pulled over early Tuesday for driving without headlights, police said. According to the criminal complaint, Cruz smelled of alcohol, had slurred speech and failed three field sobriety tests before he was handcuffed and taken to a police station for a breathalyzer test.

Cruz acknowledged passing gas, but said he didn’t fan it towards the patrolman. He said he had an upset stomach at the time, but police denied his request to go to the bathroom when he first arrived at the station. “I couldn’t hold it no more,” he said.

I know the economy is bad, but 1600 Pennsylvania looks like shit!

2008-11-11T16:22:00.000-08:00

It seems President Bush's dog Barney wasn't much in the mood for friendly attention during his walk outside the White House on Thursday. So when Reuters reporter Jon Decker reached down to pet the Scottish terrier, the seemingly docile dog snapped at him and bit Decker's right index finger.

Double or nothing?

2008-11-11T16:01:00.000-08:00

Sylvester Briddell, Jr., who probably wasn't very good with odds/statistics, was killed in February in Selbyville, Del., as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger. No word if his "friends" ponied up the money that they would have owed the stupid mother @#$%er.

Foster kids...they're kinda like Gingers

2008-11-11T15:49:00.001-08:00

A council has become the first in London to rule that smokers will no longer be able to foster children.

Redbridge Council's cabinet agreed Tuesday night to a ban on placing children with foster carers who smoke unless there are exceptional circumstances.

The local authority in northeast London said the decision, which will come into force in 2010, was made to protect children from the "damaging effects of passive and second-hand smoke."

Other councils around the country have introduced similar measures, particularly relating to very young children, but Redbridge's ban is thought to be the most far-reaching.

Buy me a drannnnnk?

2008-11-11T15:44:00.000-08:00

A New York City man is accused of trying to smuggle a date rape drug into the United States by putting the liquid in bottles he claimed contained "holy water."

U.S. Customs and Border Protection officials say laboratory tests recently confirmed that dozens of bottles seized at a western New York border crossing contained Ketamine, a powerful hallucinogenic used as a date rape drug.

Authorities say 50-year-old Warren Maynard of Brooklyn was arrested Oct. 16 near Niagara Falls after he tried to enter the U.S. from Canada, where he said he'd bought some religious items.

Jesusssssssssss Christ...

2008-11-11T15:41:00.001-08:00

Israeli police burst into one of Christianity's holiest churches yesterday and arrested two clergyman after an argument between monks erupted into a brawl next to the site of Jesus's tomb.

The clash broke out between Armenian and Greek Orthodox monks in the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem, revered as the site of Jesus's crucifixion, burial and resurrection. It began as Armenian clergymen marched in a procession commemorating the 4th-century discovery of the cross believed to have been used to crucify Jesus.

Only in Wisconsin...

2008-11-11T15:37:00.000-08:00

A 38-year-old man was cited for disorderly conduct in Fond du Lac, Wis., after he bought a beer for his sons, ages 2 and 4, at the county fair. He could not be cited for providing alcohol to minors because, under Wisconsin law, parents are exempt, but he was written up for swearing at police.

F'ing Gingers

2008-11-11T13:01:00.001-08:00

For those of you who don't remember, Obama politely declined the support fire crotch offered to throw his way. She gives everyone she's associated with a bad name: Redheads, Bi-curious women and Americans. I consider her public ginger enemy #1.

Sober Driver...not in Indiana

2008-11-11T11:40:00.000-08:00

SCHERERVILLE, Ind. –It's stories like this that make miss home. Last week in a routine traffic stop, Indiana State Police arrested a 24 year old mother who had her 1 year old in the car on drunken driving charges. The real problem occurred when police called the father to come pick up the 1 year and discovered he was drunk as well. SO there was no surprise when the grandparents showed up and both of them had dove into the bottle as well. The grandmother was not over the legal limit so she was released but police followed her back to her residence with the boy, where the party then resumed...

Where's the Juice?

2008-11-10T22:49:00.000-08:00

Last week, in East Patchogue, NY (somewhere on long island) 4 men stormed a house at 2am as an old man went out to buy milk. Why that old geiser was buying milk at that hour I will never know, but the 4 men made off with a glass carboy (which is fancy talk for water jug) full of quarters and nickels. Long Island police have no suspects as of yet but I can think of four men who are that desperate for change...

Suprise Sex

2008-11-10T22:17:00.000-08:00

New Zealand is known for alot of things. Flight of the concords, Lord of the Rings, it's abundance in Gingers and now...rape. That's right, Vipul Sharma 22 of New ZeLAND was found guilty last week for raping a girl in the back seat of his car that he had met ealrier in the eveing at a bar. After the prematurly ejaculated on the kiwi and he passed out in the back of his car. That's when the lady of the eveing had the courage to drive his ass to the nearest police station.

Taking out the trash

2008-11-10T21:57:00.000-08:00

I hate on alot of states but what can I say, I have pent up rage. This is not the case on the great state of Milwaukee, who supplies most of the beer we drink. Now I can understand that many kids run away from home but this 14 year old who was pent up in some sort of boot camp had the bright idea of hiding in a recyucling truck as a getaway. It wasn't until the truck had compacted many loads and made its drop at the local processing center that the kid was discovered semi conciouse and was treated for minor inhjuries. No word what will happen to the kid when he recovers but lets just consider him stupid.

Reason 45456sertsfdg4050534 Florida sucks

2008-11-10T21:30:00.000-08:00

I loathe no other place more than Florida. I mean, come on. They're responsible for Bush round 2 (don't think you're in the clear Ohio) and anything else that climbs out of the swamp down there. So... I'm not surprised to hear that a 22 year old Tampa resident used his 72 year old grandpa as a human shield as a means to deter authorities from arresting him. Police eventually nabbed him after he flung the feeble carcass of his decaying elder at the feet of his pursuers. It's not quite clear what charges the piece of trash was trying to avoid but I'm sure they're something trivial...it is Tampa, which is the east coast equivalent of Reno, Nevada.

Arkansas everyobody... living the dream.

2008-11-10T20:55:00.000-08:00

ok look, no one says we're holding the residents of Arkansas to a higher standard of living than the rest of us, but come on. Who tells a cop they want their can of compressed air back so they can finish getting high? Granted, she was outside a Walmart getting ripped, but that's the Midwest, I'm not judging. When officers asked what she was doing they recieved no response except for "give me my can back so I can finish getting high." The unamed woman spent the night in the slammer, was released the next morning and found back at Walmart. Awesome.

Hungary for this...

2008-11-10T20:37:00.000-08:00

If you thought Hungary was a @#$%ing depressing place to live, you're right. On the bright side, it's also where a twenty year old German teacher stripped down to her panties in an old fashioned game of truth or dare. The scandalous young teacher was scared of telling the truth, so she evoked her right to take the dare. Doing all adolescents proud, her students then told her to strip down instead of revealing anything personal about herself. Have I mentioned that I love Germany? Anyway, she was stopped only when another teacher intervened and hated on the whole damn thing.

Innocent until proven... nope he's wasted

2008-11-10T16:48:00.000-08:00

Contrary to popular belief, the Amish aren't the only locals in Lancaster, Pennsylvania that honor the sabbath. That's where police charged one area citizen for worshiping the bottle, twice. Turns out one DUI wasn't enough to hold him down as he racked up two within a 6 hour time span. The unnamed man was arrested, processed and released to his girlfriend at 11a.m. Sunday morning and was back in the slammer at 4p.m . I'd like to think there was some major partying going on, but realistically, his girlfriend is probably just a bitch.

Here's how I'd like to think it went down.

God Damn Georgians

2008-11-10T13:32:00.000-08:00

It's common knowledge that most tards like to play with fire. In Gerorgia however, it's a fact. Galen Winchell, of Sargent Georgia decided it was time to clear the cobwebs form his attic, with a @#$%ing blowtorch! Tard. Somehow, no one was hurt and this tard is now back to drinking moonshine spreading his demon seed around the south.